Crisis ends peacefully
It was a close call and a harrowing few hours, but we’re all doing ok now. Thanks to everyone who contacted the Podunkville Sheriff’s Office with offers to help in the hostage situation and with all the nickname suggestions. Those of you who just kept calling to ask about the crumb cake availability… thanks… thanks a lot. Here we were trapped in a house with a renegade mouse while being forced to listen to bad lyrics based on the popular 1954 movie ‘Carmen Jones’ starring Dorothy Dandridge and all you cared about was the crumb cake? That’s just cold, people. Just cold.
Many decent people did try to help end the situation though. Various nickname choices were offered to Big Brain by the locals, and included Sport, Skeeter, Spud, Bubby, Junior, Hoss and Sonny. Unfortunately, Big Brain didn’t take to any of the choices offered based on the fact that “they sucked” and weren’t nearly cool enough for Big Brain’s awesomeness.
Throughout all the excitement, Big Brain kept thinking about nicknames and eventually came up with a possibility on his own. After hours of being battered by the hideous singing, Stace and Hedon would have agreed to call Big Brain “Senor Poopy Pants” if that’s what he wanted, but Big Brain will now be called Fernando — at least for the present.
Pleased with the nickname agreement, Big Brain then moved on to his other demands. He demanded two copies of Queen’s Greatest Hits, a medium-rare steak from Outback Steakhouse, two dozen 100% cotton crew socks with the gold stripe across the toes, five new black low-profile ball caps, and three rolls of SweetTarts. All of these stupid demands were complied with quickly and the whole crisis boiled down to a demand for a piece of flying machinery that only exists in science fiction.
Eventually, the crisis ended peacefully when Big Brain Fernando finally agreed that – since consumer jet packs haven’t actually been invented yet – it wasn’t really reasonable to demand one as part of the conditions of ending the musical torture. Also, Big Br Fernando was getting bored with the ongoing negotiations and wanted to go play Tetris.
Stace and I just wanted to thank everyone who expressed their concern during this tense time. Oh, and the crumb cake was delicious.
Next time add a pic of the actual crumb cake and describe it in vivid detail. lol
Oh, and I left you an award over at my place if you’re interested.
But did the mouse survive?
Fernando is a good name for the former Big Brain, and reminds one of that Billy Crystal character too.
If BB tires of Fernando, “Carajo” would be a good alterego; can be said loudly and passionately (unlike, say, Musical or Delicate or Spongebob). “Caruso” could substitute (if you’re around Spanish-speaking ppl) and gets at the singing, over and over again.
Pronunciation: ca – RAW – Hoe
Carajo, def, from the Urban Dictionary:
1) crap or hell*: Sh**
I don’t give a carajo.
Go die in carajo!
2) Literally meant the lookout basket in the top mast of a Spanish galeon ship. Sailors would get very sea sick when assigned to this post, so when they would think of becoming mutinous, the captain would send them up to the carajo as punishment. Hence the Spanish interjection meaning anything from get out of here, go fly a kite, go fuck yourself, etc…
Vete para el carajo.
No me importa un carajo, I don’t care a shit!
3) Carajo
Rarely used by itself- used to mean “hell” or hellish place.
vete para carajo
“go to hell”
source: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Carajo&defid=364880
More fun with Spanish: You can also say:
¿Qué carajo quieres? (“What the fuck do you want?”)
Learning a new language does broaden one’s horizons.
Now I’ve got that damn ‘Fernando’ song by ABBA stuck in my head. Make it stop. Pleeeeeeze make it go away!
LOL 3699!
That could be a problem with the new name as Fernando doesn’t like ABBA at all and really seriously hates that particular song.
How about replacing it with “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover” or “Ring of Fire” or even better “I’m a Little Teapot?”
Hey Sheila,
Sorry… we should have taken a pic of the crumb cakes. It’s just that with all the confusion and all the people milling about it slipped my mind.
I can say that it was all cinnamony and delicious.
Thanks for the award. I’m going to check it out in more detail.
BelleDog,
I’ll keep that in mind if Fernando doesn’t work out.