Personal hygiene
Recently overheard in the truck — In front of the trucker restrooms at a rest area outside Cincinnati, Ohio. Stace is sitting in the driver’s seat, and Hedon is in the bunk.
Stace: Hmph. Look at that. A whole SUV full of men and boys just pulled up next to us. Obviously can’t read the signs that says this part is for trucks.
Hedon: Oh.
Stace: Why is it that there are a billion places where we aren’t allowed to go, but nowhere that four wheelers aren’t allowed to go? It’s bullshit.
Hedon: Some truck stops don’t allow four-wheelers in the truck parking.
Stace: That’s just because of the prostitutes. As if they can’t figure out to park in the car area and walk over to the trucks. Numbnuts.
Hedon: …
Stace: There’s goes a driver. He’ll have to wait on all those four-wheelers before he can pee.
Hedon: Hmm.
Stace: Good god. Look. All those men and boys are already coming out. Who can pee that fast?
Hedon: Hmm.
Stace: Well, they obviously didn’t take the time to wash their hands. Ugh. Look at them over at the soda machines, touching everything.
Hedon: Hmm.
Stace: And here comes the trucker. That’s just crazy. How did he even have enough time to zip his pants? That’s some serious light-speed whizzing. And clearly, no handwashing.
Hedon: …..
Stace (after a few minutes): Four wheelers are leaving.
Hedon: …..
Stace: And there goes that driver. Look at him, he’s rubbing his face — ew — probably with the same hand that he just used to pull out his penis in the bathroom! If he’s right-handed, and most people are. Ew!
Hedon: Okay. That’s it. No more bathroom play-by-play. Get in the bunk. I’m driving.
Stace: Yeah. Catch up to that driver. I’ll make a gross-out face at him.
Hedon (sarcasm in every word): Umhmm. That’s a great plan. I’ll get right on it.
YUCKKKKKKK! Not enough Purell in the world! And this is exactly why I take Purell everywhere. I’ll never look at a soda machine the same.
glad I finished my coffee before popping over here this morning.
but good point, Hedon, about cars encroaching on the little available truck parking.
I don’t think guys ever wash their hands. And as for the four-wheelers – they annoy me. But then, so do RV’s and people pulling little trailers. Also, it bothers me when a bobtail at a truckstop takes up a whole spot when he could have easily fit somewhere else.
Often, in the rest areas, especially if it’s late and there is no room on the truck parking side, I will park on the four wheeler side. I dare someone to come over and tell me to move.
ha ha ha ha! Some people are just gross! And you, Mizz Stace, sound like the kind of person I would have check my cleaning skills.
Sheila and MG,
I don’t know why she keeps watching stuff like that. My personal feeling is more of a “what I don’t know won’t hurt me” approach. I do know that my immune system has never been stronger than since I’ve been trucking… I haven’t even had a cold in over four years.
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Salena,
It pisses me off, too. I mean there are a million places you can park a bobtail or a small rv why are you taking up a truck space? I will park in the car side, too if there is nothing else.