Olive oil virgin

2009 July 17
by Hedon

It occurs to me that I seriously should have made an Italian friend years ago. If I had we probably could have avoided the unfortunate olive oil incident. You see when we heard a few years ago how good for you olive oil was supposed to be I decided we should start using it. I marched off to the grocery store and stood in the oil aisle gazing slack-jawed at all the choices.

I knew that we needed to start with something mild what with never having used it much before and with Stace not being a real huge fan of the olive. Finally I found what appeared to be the perfect choice: Extra Virgin First Press Olive Oil. I was thinking hmmm… when it comes to olive oil we are ‘extra virgin’ so that should be perfect, right? Isn’t that the usual usage of the phrase… “I was raised in the Ozarks by really boring parents so I’ve never really cooked with you before… please be gentle with me, Olive Oil.”


That is not how it works in the olive oil world. Being virgins in the olive oil world and then starting out with extra virgin first press olive oil is somewhat like a shy inexperienced girl of fifteen heading out on her first date and ending up later that night at a BDSM club wearing nipple clamps and drooling around a ball gag while some big guy named Bull whips her rear end with an English riding crop.

It clearly wasn’t the way to go. If only I had known Salena back then all that shock and dismay and drooling could have been avoided.

17 Responses
  1. 2009 July 17

    Easy mistake to make…though your characterization is hilarious and quite over the top. The RR doesn’t help with her incessant babbling about EVOO, which she uses on everything and for everything. Alas, as you now know, there are different grades for different uses.

    • 2009 July 17

      I know, huh!

      It’s like Ms Ray is some sort of barker outside the club stopping people passing by on the street whispering, “Hey you, want to have a good time? I’ve got some olive oil in here that will blow you away. You’ve GOT to try this…”

      Sometime I should post about our experiences when we found out that red wine was supposed to be good for you if you drink a glass every day. Ugh!

  2. 2009 July 17
    punxxi permalink

    dang girl, ya coulda asked or even googled it!

    • 2009 July 17

      Punxxi, that would have been the smart — even reasonable — way to go about it but I can’t really see me taking that approach. Unless it’s vital to do otherwise, I tend to go for the most highly swashbuckling solution to most dilemmas. It tends to work for me.

  3. 2009 July 17

    Yeah, olive oil ain’t no punk for us Missouri girls, is it? I love it now, but admit having freaked myself (and others) out with it at least a few several many times. Life sure was simple when it was Wesson Oil, Crisco or lard.

    • 2009 July 19

      Yeah those were the good old days. Don’t forget bacon grease. My mom never threw away an ounce of bacon grease. She used it for cooking, seasoning, frying and squeaky door hinges.

  4. 2009 July 17

    How funny that I should read this post tonight – I just finished dinner and I made my grandmother’s meatballs, which I fried in Extra Virgin Olive Oil!

    I was telling Ed that the truck smelled just like my grandmother’s house. My Aunt Jennie (my grandmother’s sister, so my father’s Aunt, hence the “Aunt Jennie”) and her husband lived with my grandmother and grandfather till the end of their lives (Aunt Jennie is the only one still alive) and the recipe and method are really hers, since she’s the one that always made them that way.

    You make your meatball mixture (I might do a post about this one day) and then you fry them in Olive Oil until they are actually quite crispy. Us kids used to LINE UP to get a freshly fried meatball. There is nothing like it on earth. Then, after several swats on the hand with the wooden spoon, my Aunt Jennie would put the rest of them in the gravy (that’s what we call “sauce”). The would cook all day and be absolutely PERFECT with the dinner meal.

    I use Olive Oil all the time. I used to make my chicken cutlets in them, but now I often use regular vegetable oil for that. Although, I’ll still fry my eggplant for eggplant parmigiana in olive oil. The extra virgin and first press and all that have a real distinct flavor, so I save that for when you need to really taste it – regular olive oil is okay for the frying part.

    But it’s really quite delicious….and just like in the Italian restaurants, it’s great for dipping a piece of Italian bread into…..a little salt and pepper and maybe, if you’re in the mood, a few drops of balsamic…..

    Ahhhhh, bliss!!

    • 2009 July 19

      Damn! Those meatballs sound GOOD!

      I bought some mild olive oil and used it quite a bit when we were home this last month and it went over much better than the extra virgin.

  5. 2009 July 18
    RogueShadow permalink

    Hey, I’m a friend of Chaos’s. First time reader, and just and to say “That is too funny!”, and I can’t wait to read the rest of your posts. : p

    • 2009 July 19

      Hey Rogue,

      Welcome! Glad you’re liking the site. Hang out for a while.

  6. 2009 July 19
    punxxi permalink

    We have 2 or 3 kinds of olive oil depending on what it’s being used for. if you love pasta, try to find Dreamfields…it has 5 net carbs /serving. We tried every lowcarb pasta known to man,this one is great, it’s good enough that we never tell people it’s low carb until after they have eaten it and they all claim they can’t tell the difference. we never fry our meatnballs, i think that is a regional type thing, kinda like what you stuff in your braccioles .

    • 2009 July 19

      I am definitely looking for that pasta. I bought some whole wheat pasta, but it was still crazy high on the carbs so Stace couldn’t have it.

      I’m not sure what braccioles are but I bet I would stuff mine with… hmm… pie. :)

  7. 2009 July 20

    Punxxi….where are you from? I guess I should make clear that they aren’t “fried” in the sense of fried food in a deep fryer type of thing….they are more fried/browned all around the meatball. Most often we just throw ‘em in the gravy (also a regional thing – we don’t call it “sauce”) and let them cook that way. I’ll have to check out that low carb pasta (or macaroni as we call it) – sounds like a good way to have it and not freak out about the carb content.

    Oh, and I LOVE bracciole!!!

    • 2009 July 20

      “Oh, and I LOVE bracciole!!!”

      Stuffed with pie?

  8. 2009 July 20
    Just Stopping By permalink

    All I can say is thanks! That was damn funny. I’m quite sure that when I go to cook dinner with a little olive oil, I’m only going to see that poor 15 year old….

    • 2009 July 20

      Hey welcome, Just,

      I wouldn’t feel too sorry for her if I were you. I mean she really should have gone back to vegetable oil after the nipple clamps — I don’t know what she was thinking cooking the whole meal with the stuff. :)

  9. 2009 July 26

    Thought you might like to read this post by my friend Michelle: Calabrian olive oil: cossari extravergine olio di oliva biologico

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